Saturday 28 June 2008

First sexual experience

After my last post on sexology, I received a number of very interesting comments. Laurie initiated the discussion and it went on from there.

This was the first time (and perhaps the last) that I inspired someone to blog out how it was for them. But from her and others it soon emerged that innocence about, and ignorance of, sexual detail was fairly widespread, and had not been confined just to my adolescence as I had believed.

I thought it would be interesting to explore first sexual experiences to see what triumphs and disasters people had to recount.

Then I remembered that my daughter reads this blog and I changed my mind. Children! Even grown up ones.

15 comments:

MYM said...

Oh lordy, yeah I wouldn't want to read that about my father...eeesh.

But, I think regardless of when people grow up, they're pretty ignorant about sex, I mean ... that's pretty normal I think.

We just think kids know more today ... I don't think they do. They do get exposed to more than we did ... but I don't think that makes a difference.

I remember when I was 13, my 30 year old cousin was going on about how my generation was so exposed to sexual issues, and how she wished she was growing up in the 70s, and how kids my age knew so much more than she did when she was 13. The reality was I didn't have a clue what she was talking about, LOL. I was completely in the dark. That's the way it goes.

laurie said...

oh golly ernest. i think i'd better not bite on this one.

i'm starting to twitch.

all i will tell you is that i was young, he was older, and i was scared. so i kept making my eyes really wide and like i was terrified (i wasn't THAT terrified) and he'd wilt.

time after time.

i was a virgin several days longer than he had intended me to be.

John said...

drowsey - much more innocence around than we think!

laurie - that is absolutely priceless! I really think we are going to have to give you a chinese burn until you do blog it!!

laurie said...

hell, you worry about your daughter reading your blog... my mother reads mine. much worse!

Lane Mathias said...

My mother doesn't read my blog but she's always there, in my mind, peering over my shoulder! The children are really there though and that's much worse:-)

The nuns never talked about sex. I remember learning about one saint (can't remember her name) who died rather than be raped. One girl asked, 'how did she stop him?' to which the nun replied 'there are ways girls. There are ways'.

laurie said...

lane, you gotta love those nuns.

although that story, for some reason, brings to mind the terrible fire in the 1940s in ireland--the girls' orphanage caught on fire, and the nuns wouldn't unlock the doors because it would be unseemly for the men of the town (who were trying to rescue the orphans) to see the girls in their nightclothes.

many, many girls burned to death that night.

sorry to cast such a gloomy pall over this .... nuns always get my back up.

Z said...

I think my daughter (34) would love to read about my first sexual experience. She's not getting the chance though. I'm not anywhere near grown-up enough for that.

John said...

I've been away for a few days, nice to catch up with the comments.

laurie - I think I would find that *very* inhibiting. And interesting tale about the nuns. I believe a similar thing happened in Saudi with the religious police.

lane - aah, to be in the mind of a nun, and to know "the ways".

z - I know exactly what you mean. I remember reading Portnoy's Complaint when I was about 40 and thinking I probably wasn't old enough.

Blossomcottage said...

Oh I am so tempted to say I will tell you about it when it happens!!... but somehow I don't think you would believe me!
Oh well it was worth a try.x
Blossom

John said...

But then again blossom, I think it might be rude to believe you??!

Anonymous said...

I remember a girl at my school skipping into the classroom when we were about 7 and declaring "men have balls you know!"
We all told her not to be so ridiculous and totally refused to believe her. I can't quite remember when that understanding crumbled...

John said...

mud - welcome. There's got to be a book about all these early recollections; probably published already? If not, an opportunity indeed. Plus a license to be nosey.

Karen said...

First time for me (aged 18) was a classic, 'Oh. Is that it?'

John said...

karen - was that you or him? (Just teasing)

Karen said...

LOL! Might have been him as well, now you mention it :o)